Life post-treatment comes with many challenges. One of those challenges is handling questions about why you do not drink. Now, the question itself may not be overtly triggering. However, chances are you will grow tired of constantly hearing and answering it. Furthermore, many people may not understand your answers if they have common misconceptions surrounding substance use disorder (SUD).
You may feel shame, guilt, or embarrassment the first time someone asks why you are not drinking. Remember: the fact that you are in recovery says more about you than the disease you are coping with. Despite the discomfort you may experience when first hearing the question, you may begin to feel differently as time goes on.
Do not let the judgment of others stop you from recognizing the milestone that is your sobriety. The more time you pass sober, the more self-confidence you may gain in the person you are and how far you have come in your recovery journey.
As you are most likely reading this while in recovery, chances are you understand alcohol use disorder (AUD). AUD can be defined as “an impaired ability to stop or control alcohol use despite social, occupational, or health consequences.” It is one of the most common SUDs across the country. It is also known as alcoholism or alcohol abuse, alcohol dependence, and alcohol addiction.
AUD is so common that the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism (NIAAA) cited that 14.1 million adults in 2019 had the disorder. As a brain disease, AUD causes social problems and changes the brain physically, leading to an array of other potential medical conditions.
Some of the medical conditions or harmful effects individuals experience due to AUD include:
These long-term effects can occur in people who drink excessively. Finding the line between excessive drinking and AUD can be quite a challenge.
Though the line between excessive drinking and AUD can be paper thin, you can make a better determination by recognizing the different stages of developing AUD.
These stages include:
It goes without saying that for individuals in recovery, recovery is contingent on the refusal to drink. Many people throughout the world decide not to drink for several reasons.
There are creative ways to refuse a drink without disclosing the fact you are in recovery if you prefer your privacy around the subject. One of those solutions is to establish yourself as the designated driver. You can also attend social events with a sober companion, such as another individual in recovery or someone who chooses not to drink. That way, you can keep each other accountable.
Not disclosing recovery information is not a cop-out or admittance of shame. Seeking treatment is a courageous choice and maintaining a life of recovery requires constant work. Never let your efforts go noticed. Nevertheless, if you are comfortable discussing your recovery, do so confidently and in a way that educates others on addiction and destigmatizes seeking help.
Another concern for you, especially in early recovery, may be staying sober when your friends still drink. It is okay to have friends who still drink—but not if their friendship or level of alcohol consumption is unconducive to your sobriety. Their poor habits may threaten your recovery.
Additionally, communicate your needs to your friends who still drink. That may include asking them to refrain from drinking in front of you or setting other boundaries. Sober buddies and support groups will become exceptionally necessary during this time. In addition to helping you get on your feet in early recovery, they can offer advice on how to go about setting boundaries with these friends.
Do not let the pressure of people asking you why you do not drink impact your recovery. Instead, answer confidently, say what makes you comfortable, and educate others when the opportunity arises.
Picture this situation: you are at your first social event since leaving treatment, and someone offers you a drink. Of course, you stick to your recovery and refuse the drink. As the night goes on, people may question why you are not drinking and even ask you directly. Depending on how you feel, you may choose to be honest and take the opportunity to educate others about addiction recovery. However, if you are not ready to have those conversations, that is okay too. The important thing is that you leave the event confidently and with your sobriety intact. To learn more about how to answer questions about not drinking, call NorthStar Transitions at (303) 558-6400.
